it's been so long since i last updated my blog. so i guess there's so little people are still blogging right? cus there so many social networking invented already. so yeaahh. there's twitter, path, facebook. what else? combine all of them it is still equivalent to blogger. haha. so anyway, i never really had my 15 monthsary with my boyfriend. we had a very tough situation. it gets out of hand. it involves people around me. yeah, situation seemed very chaotic on that moment of time. i love him, he love me but some things just get corrupted. he thought i moved on and his friends too but in fact no. i wasn't at all. i pretended to be moving on but hey, that seems so hard for me y'know. that moment really knock some sense into him for all this while there so many hard times im facing it alone. but now after he enters his NS life, i feel so blessed. Allah has open up his eyes and heart finally. he's a changing man. infact he changed from a boy to a man. yes. i heard alot about guys that will change after entering their NS life. it doesn't matter from bad to good or good to bad. but mine, Alhamdulillah he has changed to a better person. he's starting to think about his future. i mean literally thinking out of the box. but sometimes that childishness in him still there. there isn't any problem about it. cus everyone even they have grow old with 2 3 kids, they will still have their childish side within them right that they will show to people once in awhile? yeahh, that's normal ;) After what had happened, both of us really open up our minds and hearts. to give in to each other. mistake made, lesson learnt. yes, first time is a mistake but second and third time isn't a mistake anymore but it's a fucken choice. i really hope things would be better for both of us. yes. in two days time it's our 17th Months together. i'm so happy and blessed. another 7 more months we gonna celebrate our big day ;) oh wait no, my big day first ok hunney? MAY. hehe. But for now, i hafta focus on my present. cus situations seems hard for me. things change too drastically. i'm gonna endure and get over this phase soon. yes, boyfriend is in NS life, situation change and it sucks. i only have less than 24 hours per week with him. haisss :'( sometimes i feel like crying my lungs out but i reminded myself over and over again to stay strong no matter what cus this thing comes once in a while. god is testing me :') Boyfriend, if you happened to read my blog again, i just wanna say thank you for always loving me and i know both of us can face anything together. learn from our mistakes ok. i love you so much. 281010 will always stay alive. i love you so much Mohamed Shah Nasrullah ;) xoxo.
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